you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
