Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
