we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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