i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
