But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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