dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Will you blow on my dice?
too bad you live with your parents still
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
