Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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