No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
