You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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