how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize
