He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
