Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Randomize
