we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
