This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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