we have pet lesbian snakes
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
