were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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