Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
