thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Randomize
