So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
