Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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