i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm like, not good at living.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
