I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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