How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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