if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Randomize
