He is such a slut. More and more my type.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
He felt like a one man threesome
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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