k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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