hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
