Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I just want to make out with him forever
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
