Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
