i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
