No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize