I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
he thought i was a dude.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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