I showed him my bush... on skype.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
