you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
