just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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