Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Randomize
