I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
