I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
