took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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