Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
