He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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