i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
