What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I just forgot I was standing up.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
