I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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