But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
