plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
