He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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