Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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