gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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