So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
and you fell through a lawn chair
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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